Shine On, You Crazy Diamond



My wife showed me this one. She was reading Fitness magazine and came across an ad with nothing but a cryptic letter G.  Two pages later, there was a similar ad, only this one said: SHINE ON.

So, what is the product these ads are trying to promote? G? Shine On?


As far as I’m concerned, companies can waste their money any way they want to. Any advertising will only help the economy, and two full-page ads will certainly help Fitness magazine survive in hard times. But these ads definitely win the stupid award.

Way down at the lower-right corner, in print so small you practically need a microscope to read it, it says “© 2009 S-VC, Inc.”

Off to Google I went, armed with Shine On and S-VC, Inc. And lo and behold, it turns out that this ad is for some kind of Gatorade product.

For fuck’s sake. Were they really expecting people to know this from looking at the ad?


3 responses to “Shine On, You Crazy Diamond

  1. Well, um, you did end up Googling to find out what a product was. Call to action? Seems pretty effective to me.

  2. Yeah, but he had to look at the copywrite print to find the information. The COPYWRITE PRINT! You’re lucky if you can get someone to read the regular copy in your ad. No one but Marc here would ever try to read the copywrite print just to look up what the hell is being advertised.

    This may very well be the worst ad showcased here so far. Cryptic and ugly some of the others may be, at least you can generally figure out what they’re selling, or at least one can more easily figure it out, anyway.

  3. Frank’s right. Try Googling “Shine On” and see what you get. Understand that if I was in a doctor’s office reading this ad, I would have put the magazine down and never knew what the ad was for. Same thing if I didn’t have this blog. There’s no way I would have bothered tracking this down.

    I think the problem here is one that is common to a lot of ads. The manufacturer makes Gatorade and Shine On. So everyone in the company walks around with “Gatorade” in their head all day. If you could read minds, the people at the water cooler are thinking Gatorade. The people in the conference room have Gatorade going around in their heads. The janitor is thinking Gatorade as he’s sweeping the floor.

    The marketing people, who are thinking Gatorade Gatorade Gatorade start talking to the ad agency, who eventually pick up the mantra. By the time they start designing the ad, “Gatorade” is like breathing to them. They don’t stop and think like a consumer. So the ad agency shows the big G to everyone and they’re all thinking, “Yes! Gatorade!” You and I are thinking, WTF?

    Some people seem to believe that if you come up with a bad ad campaign, and the ad campaign gets attention, then the advertisers have done their job. The goal of advertising isn’t to get people talking about ads; it’s to sell products. Imagine an ad campaign for milk featuring vomiting cows. It would take about a day before everyone in the country was talking about commercials with the barfing cows. It would take about a week before sales of milk started to drop.