McDonald’s Dollar Menu

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I’m a vegetarian and I believe in eating healthy food. So I’m not a McDonald’s customer. If I’m on a road trip, and I’m hungry, and there’s a place to eat off the freeway, and there’s only a McDonald’s, I’ll find something to eat there.

I’m having a little bit of trouble understanding who this ad is targeting. I know it isn’t me or anyone I know.

I haven’t seen this ad campaign before, so I’m not sure if I’m supposed to know the cheesy-looking guy with the cheesy-looking mustache in the upper left corner named Paul, the original Dollar Menunaire. I’m not sure what a menunaire is.

This ad ran in People, whose readers are predominantly women. McDonald’s is apparently trying to lure women into their restaurant so they can buy a hot fudge sundae. And it’s only a dollar. Good deal.

But the person giving the tip, Paul, looks like someone who does needle drugs. And he’s white as a ghost, so he apparently never gets any sun. Is Paul the kind of guy that women trust to tell them about food?

I can imagine the conversation:

Paul: Yo hey, it’s me, Paul, the original Dollar Menunaire!

Donna: Paul…Paul…I don’t know anyone named Paul…oh, wait, are you that creepy guy in high school who was caught pulling all those fire alarms? Your look hasn’t changed since then, I see.

Paul: Got a little helpful hint to, y’know, fulfill a need.

Donna: A need? You always were a pervert. Nice running into you. I have to go.

Paul: It’s called the hot fudge sundae and can be found on McDonald’s superb-ilicious Dollar Menu.

Donna: Leave me alone or I’m going to call the police.

Paul: It’s hot, fudgy and sundae-y.

Donna: That’s great, Paul. See ya. Give my regards to your sister.

Paul: (leering) And for just a buck, it’s just what your desire requires.

Donna: (into her cell phone): I’m at the Mini Mart on Ridge Rd, near Chapham. This guy Paul is propositioning me and he won’t go away. Can you get someone over here?

Paul: That’s probably more than a hint, y’know.

Donna: No, you wouldn’t take a hint. Why don’t you just kiss my butt?

Paul: It’s a sweet one.

I did a Google search and found out that our creepy friend Paul has a creepy web site that will appeal to creepy people:

The next time I’m driving along the freeway and I get hungry, I’ll hold out for Jack in the Box. Or Wendy’s. I don’t want to run into Paul or any of his friends.


One response to “McDonald’s Dollar Menu

  1. Arguably, McDonald’s best magazine ads–at least that I can remember–were from the late 80s, talking about how healthy their food was. Not sure how honest it was, but they had food that was “staged” nicely, a simple headline to make the connection that the food could be healthy, and… I guess the copy was there, if anyone wanted to read more about how the food could be healthy.

    I don’t get McDonald’s more recent ads. They seem to come in three categories: the Paul Menunaire ones, the “scentimental” ones, that seem more about trying to get the reader to shed a tear over a sweet story rather than selling food–not sure how those are supposed to work, even if someone did read the stories–and the rather basic ones showing off a new menu item, which tends to be staged worse and worse as time goes by. Not sure how any of the three are supposed to work for McDonald’s, really.